Purposefully Present: 5 Action Steps for Staying Present
In this post YOU will discover:
Why living in the present is so important to creating a life defined by YOU
5 concepts I use in defining my own presence each day
In today's fast-paced world, it's so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of constant distractions and thoughts about the past or future. Sometimes, it feels like my mind is going through it’s own version of tug-of-war. Constantly being pulled from worries from the past and fear about the future. On the other hand, we constantly hear about how important it is to stay present as this is essential for finding inner peace and fulfillment. So with that, how can we find common ground to understand our thoughts and practice being present in every moment? In true transparency, this is something I continue to work on each day - after all it is a process we get to practice every day! But, I do have some steps I have found great momentum with, and I’d love to share those with YOU. These five action steps have helped me stay present lately even among the busy days of being a behavior specialist, wife and mom of two young girls, entrepreneur and more! By implementing these steps, YOU too can cultivate a greater sense of calm and be ready to stay present even when faced with ‘all the things’.
Letting go of the Unfinished:
One of the biggest challenges I’ve had lately to staying present is the nagging feeling that there are unfinished tasks or unresolved issues weighing on my mind. I’ve come so far in this, but recently have noticed that those unfinished tasks around the house are starting to creep in! To overcome this, I’ve learned that it's crucial to develop awareness for the thoughts and feelings as they surface. As soon as I gain that awareness that something is shifting with me, I am able to create space between that thought and my response. Actually this is what helps me choose responding rather than reacting most of the time! Learning to listen for the thoughts of, “I have to finish this” or “I need to get this finished before I move on” are key indicators that you are ready to practice letting go of those unfinished tasks or unresolved issues. Now remember, this blog post is all about staying present. Which is important to remember, because what I’m not trying to persuade you to do is start a bunch of tasks and be okay not finishing them. But instead, by learning to listen to our thoughts, and learning that it is okay to pause projects so we can be present in other situations, is key to living that present lifestyle.
“this constant comparison and self-imposed
pressure easily takes us away from the present”
Ditching Arbitrary Timelines:
Society as a whole, often imposes arbitrary timelines on us. From influence from parents, friends, social media, we are constantly being reminded of things we should do, at certain times in our lives. From early in our child, we are often pressured to achieve certain milestones by specific ages. However, this constant comparison and self-imposed pressure easily takes us away from the present. And arbitrary timelines, don’t just happen with milestones. They happen in our day to day lives too. Things like, “it’s Sunday so I have to get all the laundry done today” or “I have to workout for at least an hour for it to count”. Instead of allowing arbitrary timelines to define your present moment, focus on setting realistic goals and milestones that align with your personal values and aspirations. Embrace the idea that everyone's journey is unique, and there's no predefined timeline for success or happiness. By releasing the notion of arbitrary timelines, you can fully engage with the present and appreciate your own progress!
Leaving Shouldville behind :
Oh Shouldville. It’s a place I used to live in, but now, thanks to the work I’ve learned by being present, I only visit there once in a while! The word "should" can be a significant barrier to staying present. We often burden ourselves with unrealistic expectations and a sense of obligation based on societal norms or the opinions of others (there’s that society reference again!) In short, we visit (or live in) shouldville because we are hyper-focused on what we think we ‘should’ do based on other people’s thoughts. For anyone reading who is a ‘people-pleaser’, my guess is that you are very familiar with living in shouldville. So what is the issue with shouldville? Simply put, it’s exhausting to live here. We are constantly making decisions based on other people’s opinions, instead of our own. To overcome this, it’s important to take a step back and connect with your core beliefs and values. Ask yourself, "What truly matters to me?" on a daily basis! Embrace authenticity and align your actions with your beliefs. By living according to your own values, you can shed the burden of "shoulds", leave shouldville behind and empower yourself to experience the present moment more fully.
“Ask yourself, "What truly matters to me?" on a daily basis”
Being Comfortable with Uncomfortable:
Life is full of ups and downs, bumps in the road if you will, and I believe they are all here to remind us of how amazing life can be. It’s important to remember that uncertainty and discomfort are an inevitable part of the human experience. The law of polarity tells us that there is an opposite for everything in our world. There is duality built into our existence and that everything has a built in opposite that can’t exist without it. The law of Polarity helps me to remember that without discomfort I wouldn’t know comfort. Without uncertainty wouldn’t find gratitude in certainty. But most of all, it reminds me that anything that is happening in my world, is happening for me. So I can learn, grow, expand, and evolve. Often, our minds resist uncomfortable situations, and we seek ways to escape. However, true growth and presence lie in embracing discomfort. A strategy that helps me during these uncomfortable moments is to practice mindfulness allow myself to fully experience the emotions and sensations that arise. By developing resilience and acceptance within yourself, you can navigate discomfort with grace and remain present even in the face of adversity.
Saving Nothing for Later:
Many of us fall into the trap of postponing joy and happiness, believing that we can only experience them once certain conditions are met. We frequently find ourselves saying “one day” or “I’ll get that done later”. However, the present moment is the only guarantee we have. One day will always remain one day. Later will always remain in the future. So instead of living a life of ‘later’ it’s time to embrace the mindset of "saving nothing for later." Engage in activities that bring you joy, spend quality time with loved ones, and pursue your passions now rather than waiting for the perfect moment. If we create this as a standard, then we regain control of our present moments! And by fully immersing yourself in the present, you'll create a life that's rich with meaning and fulfillment.
“the present moment is the only guarantee we have”
Staying present is a lifelong practice that requires conscious effort and commitment. But the good news is, is that YOU get to practice this every day! Being present is a lifestyle that is available to YOU, by taking small, simple, and strategic steps! By implementing these five action steps—letting go of the unfinished, ditching arbitrary timelines, leaving Shouldville behind, being comfortable with uncomfortable, and saving nothing for later—YOU too can cultivate a deeper sense of mindfulness and live a purposeful life that YOU are madly in love with every day! Embrace the power of the present moment and unlock the profound joy and contentment that comes with it. Are YOU ready? Let’s go!